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Diálogos no tribunal – ótimo!

Advogado   : –
‘Qual é a data do seu aniversário?’
Testemunha: – ’15 de julho.’
Advogado   : – ‘Que ano?’
Testemunha: – ‘Todo ano!!’
____________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________ __

Advogado    : -‘Essa doença, a miastenia gravis, afeta sua memória?’
Testemunha: – ‘Sim.’
Advogado   : – ‘E de que modo ela afeta sua memória?’
Testemunha: – ‘Eu esqueço das coisas.’
Advogado   : – ‘Você esquece… Pode nos dar um exemplo de algo que você
tenha  esquecido?’
____________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________ ___

Advogado   : – ‘Que idade tem seu filho?’
Testemunha: – ’38 ou 35, não me lembro.’
Advogado   : – ‘Há quanto tempo ele mora com você?’
Testemunha: – ‘Há 45 anos.’

____________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _____

Advogado   : -‘Qual foi a primeira coisa que seu marido disse quando
acordou aquela manhã?’
Testemunha: – ‘Ele disse, ‘Onde estou, Bete?’
Advogado   : – ‘E por que você se aborreceu?’
Testemunha: – ‘Meu nome é Célia.’

____________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _____

Advogado  : – ‘Me diga, doutor…. não é verdade que, ao morrer no sono,
                     
    a pessoa só saberá que morreu na manhã
seguinte?’
____________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _____

Advogado   : – ‘Seu filho mais novo, o de 20 anos…
Testemunha: – ‘Sim.’
Advogado   : – ‘Que idade ele tem?’
____________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _____

Advogado  : – ‘Sobre esta foto sua… o senhor estava presente quando ela
foi tirada?’
____________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________ ______

Advogado   : – ‘Então, a data de concepção do seu bebê foi 08 de agosto?’
Testemunha: – ‘Sim, foi.’
Advogado   : – ‘E o que você estava fazendo nesse dia?’

____________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________ ______

Advogado   : – ‘Ela tinha 3 filhos, certo?’
Testemunha: – ‘Certo.’
Advogado   : – ‘Quantos meninos?’
Testemunha: – ‘Nenhum.’
Advogado   : – ‘E quantas eram meninas?’
____________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _______

Advogado   : – ‘Sr. Marcos, por que acabou seu primeiro casamento?’
Testemunha: – ‘Por morte do cônjuge.’
Advogado   : – ‘E por morte de que cônjuge ele acabou?’
____________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _______

Advogado   : – ‘Poderia descrever o suspeito?’
Testemunha: – ‘Ele tinha estatura mediana e usava barba.’
Advogado   : – ‘E era um homem ou uma mulher?’
____________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _______

Advogado    : – ‘Doutor, quantas autópsias o senhor já realizou em
pessoas
mortas?’
Testemunha: – ‘Todas as autópsias que fiz foram em pessoas mortas…’
____________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _______

Advogado    : – ‘Aqui na corte, para cada pergunta que eu lhe fizer,
sua
resposta deve ser oral, Ok? Que escola você  freqüenta?’
Testemunha: – ‘Oral.’
 ____________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _______

Advogado    : – ‘Doutor, o senhor se lembra da hora em que começou a
examinar  o corpo da vitima?’
Testemunha: – ‘Sim, a autópsia começou às 20:30 hs.’
Advogado   : – ‘E o sr. Décio já estava morto a essa hora?’
Testemunha: – ‘Não… Ele estava sentado na maca, se perguntando porque eu
estava fazendo aquela autópsia nele.’
____________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________ ________

Advogado  : – ‘O senhor está qualificado para nos fornecer uma amostra de
urina?’
____________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________ ________

************ Essa é a melhor ************

Advogado    : – ‘Doutor, antes de fazer a autópsia, o senhor checou o

pulso da  vítima?’
Testemunha: – ‘Não.’
Advogado   : –  ‘O senhor checou a pressão arterial?’
Testemunha: – ‘Não.’
Advogado   : – ‘O senhor checou a respiração?’
Testemunha: – ‘Não.’
Advogado   : – ‘Então, é possível que a vítima estivesse viva quando a
autópsia  começou?’
Testemunha: – ‘Não.’
Advogado   : – ‘ Como o senhor pode ter essa certeza?’
Testemunha: – ‘Porque o cérebro do paciente estava num jarro sobre a
mesa.’
Advogado   : – ‘Mas ele poderia estar vivo mesmo assim?’
Testemunha: – ‘Sim, é possível que ele estivesse vivo e cursando Direito
em  algum lugar!!!’

Categoria ,

Conrado Adolpho

Minha missão no mundo: "Construir um mundo melhor por meio da internet". Autor do livro "Os 8Ps do Marketing Digital" e entusiasta da internet como fenômeno social.

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